Maybe, this is why.

Kadang-kadang, impian kita tinggi sangat untuk berusaha lengkapkan dan hadiahkan sesuatu untuk orang yang kita sayang.

Rupa-rupanya, kita ni tak penting pun bagi mereka. 

Maybe this is why some people stay to be alone. 

18 / 30

 This will be the last year, I'll be celebrating my birthday.

I will not waiting for this date anymore, nor expecting to be celebrated.

I just don't feel like to celebrating anything anymore.

Happy 30th and the last my dear self.  There's no more to celebrate for dunya.

Ya Allah, grant me the khusunul khotimah. 

Slow & Painful Death

I've watched movie titled "Friends with kids.." the female actor asking the male actor, "which do you prefer.. Slow and painful death or quick and easy death.." 

Twice the male actor answered the same thing.. 'quick and easy death... " and reasoning with a question..

" why would you want to go thru the painful death.. Wasn't it easier with the quick death.." 

He didn't get it. 

After he's been into partnership, then he understood why the female actor choose the answer of slow and painful death.

The reason is because, she wanted to have the chance to say goodbye to people that she love. 

But in reality, none can choose how we die. But we can choose how to leave our loves one to feel loved.

I hope, people that I care feel that I do care and love them. 

I'm sorry if I wasn't showing my affection that enough. But I do truly care. 

Because they know the truth, too.

 

They were scared, for a long time. 

They knew, sooner or later they will be doomed. 

Dear brother and sisters in Palestine, Syria and all nation. 

We will join you soon. 

May our faith be as strong as you are. 

May Allah guide us along the way to fight for the right things. 

Be strong. 

Keep us in your dua, for us to fight along with all of you. 

Kelesuan 3.0

 Should we just die in the hand of incompetent government?

The government that we didn't choose.  And the government that selfishly done elections in the middle of pandemic. The government that keep on making SOP that didn't  have efficient result. Doing all the roadblocks but the figure of affected still going higher.

The politicians are the most clever people to play fools. 

Should we be angry?

2020, 2021. Almost 2 years we fighting pandemic. Most of the rakyat are struggling to make the ends meet.

School still doesn't have the best approach to deliver the lesson effectively. 

Kids aren't going to meet their friends regularly anymore. 

Why. You, with powers turned blind and selfish. Why with all the double standards.

Allahuakbar. We all been tested. May we be granted with patience and ease of heart. Semoga setiap dari kita dilimpahkan rezeki yang berkat despite keadaan yang sukar ini.

Jaga diri. Let the fools play their part. Let us take care of ourselves. #KitaJagaKita  

Semoga semua berada dalam keadaan yang sihat selalu. 

Abah Daim

2 May 2021

20 Ramadan

During sahur my dad forward a death certificate. Under Abah Daim's name. My heart skips a beat. 

I looked down. 

My eyes starts to tears.

It's the time.

Last week he been warded in ICU. With few complications. 

I guess it was a sign. 

How is Mak Kiah at this moment. 

I hope I could come and stay for awhile by her side. 

Ya Allah, grant Abah Daim bin Uteh the highest jannah. May he be among the righteous.